The name's Frezailah Atilia,

Weyna's crib.

2008-11-14T09:55:00.000-08:00

WOOHOO! like seriously what a day man. I thank God that Weyna's house is in Bangi. kalau tidak menyangap aku sorang dekat Bangi rumah Aunt Su -.- *pftt. but yeah hmmm, i felt guilty. yes, guilty sangat dekat Virginie.

Soulmate ever-er,

I AM REALLY SORRY! :'(

Please forgive me oh. I beg you.

As I reach Sentral, Aunt Su message pula, she said that she's in rush and asked me to pass the stuffs to her daughter, Anna. so yeah, i waited for Anna at Sentral. blablabla we talk we laugh and train sampai, i gotta rush to UKM since Icky, Weyna, Syra lama tunggu. GOOOODDDDDDD! i swear in the name of God, the train was packed, seriously, so so packed. I couldn't even breathe. damnit! and the train, perghh full of macha anne. hihi jahat saje :p

Hmmmm, from sentral to midvalley to seputeh to salak selatan to bandar tasik selatan to serdang (hahaha bajet hafal en, entah betul ke tak lol) to kajang and finaaaaallllyyyy UKM. hooyeah i berjaya jejak kaki sini, first time bai! :D *hahaha, tiru abg bonceng icky :P*

sampai saje UKM, thereeee, Icky and Syra fetch me (jalan kaki saje) panas kolam tak ingat weh. perghhh. kolam ketiak bergelen baldi do. caraaa habis, haha. jalan sikit depan depan depan sikit tu, thereeee, Weyna dalam kerete hehe dia drive. thank God! ingat kena naik cab ke jalan kaki ke, hahahaha. so yeah, illegal way pun dia bawak, but still she can, she's so brave. unlike you! :) anyways, thank you darling, for the ride eventhough you was so so scared to make a u-turn, so we have to go pass the roundabout (letihhhhhh aku) hahaha muah.

As we reached Weyna's house, terus menuju ke bilik dia. haha peduli ha malu tak malu. letih do panas semua, eleh siod :p lepak bilik Weyna, baring terbongkang menyangap berempat, cayaaaa habis. sejuk tak ingat weh, gigil beku (winkwink) i likeeeeee<33 weeeee

lalalalala~ so yeah, we've come to the climax. HA-HA-HA. Icky sama itu Weyna boleh main tukar-tukar baju lah dress la ini itu lah. me and Syra yang letih kena tengok o.O haha, no offence bABy gUrLzZZz!!~ but yeah, I like this one dress, stripes, comeeeeelllll sangat =D syra pakai, i asked her to, eh sumpah suits her best man. i like i like i like ;) it turns me ON! HAHAHAHAHAHA. amik kauuu Syra, dah ikut-ikut you lah nak sontot Icky *oppsssss ;p

Tapi ni paling cayaaa lah. it reveals that, Me and Myself and I saje yang dah mandi dalam bilik itu! hahahahahaha. Syra lah muka taboleh blah, lost gila muka dia, haa betul-betul ketara tak mandi haha alololo chumeylzz gilew awuck, meoww grr grr. ha-ha.

RINDUUUUUUUUUUUU!

Still holding on. Not.

2008-11-13T08:45:00.000-08:00

Everything's changed. well as fast as a lightning. everytime I think about it, it tears me up inside. BUT. i'm done with tears, yeah, I got no more tears to cry.

What is my problem to think about you this long?

slowly you come into my life, nicely you tell me that you love me.
and then, you take off and leaving me a broken heart.

The New-Refreshed Me,

Frezailah Atilia Mohd Zaini

Now that it's over and done, you can't hurt me oh you can't bring me down. I sadly realized now, oh boy I don't even know what I liked about you. You're different now. But it's okay, I thank God that now I have the strength to let everything go, slowly. You want it to be this way, then yeah, hear me saying this: "AS YOU WISH BABY" :)

I thought that everything was perfect,

Isn't that what it supposed to be?

Words to live on.

2008-11-13T08:39:00.000-08:00

e l l y : gobstopper : ) says:
if you love smthing someone
e l l y : gobstopper : ) says:
let it go
e l l y : gobstopper : ) says:
if it comes back
e l l y : gobstopper : ) says:
then its your forever
e l l y : gobstopper : ) says:
if it doesnt then it was never meant to be
e l l y : gobstopper : ) says:
saba tauu
e l l y : gobstopper : ) says:
i tau
e l l y : gobstopper : ) says:
your life this year paling drastic berubah2

End of me.

2008-11-09T22:40:00.000-08:00

MOTHAFUCK! SPM IS COMING;; TOMORROW.

Let's make it this way, I'M DEAAAADDDDDDDDDDD

Another missing.

2008-11-09T22:31:00.000-08:00

Ni ha lagi sorang minah ni menghilang, mak aihhhh -.-
Where are you baby? It's you I miss so so much.

seeeeeeeeee, I think i'm losing my friends lah day by day. lepas yang ni, yang itu. *slap self*

Tengku Aisyah Asyikin;;

WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN, MY LITTLE GIRL?

*ni betul-betul menghilangkan diri gila lama. entah mana nak cari.

Messenger partner.

2008-11-09T22:20:00.000-08:00

BITCH, WHERE THE HELL ARE YOU?

Mana you weh? it's been an ages since I last talk to you man. aku yang nak SPM, kau yang hilang. haha apa lah. rinduuuuu totak. haih, dah lah jumpa pun punya susah. nyirap lah ni kan, citt. hihi. watlek watlek. after spm, we're so gonna kick ass alright. you and me, just the two of us, as planned okay? WEEEEEEEE~

Hear me saying this sayang,
OOHHHHH I MISSSS YOUUUUUUU ELLLYYYYYY! <33

Partner in crime,

Elly Mysara.

This suffering.

2008-11-09T10:54:00.000-08:00

I'm getting all emo-ish these past few days. haih, I just don't know why. I think I'm missing everything. I miss my happiness and my life. but most of all, I miss him.

I know I have to be strong. but I'm weak, very. I tried, but I failed. i've got nothing to do but cry. I tried acting and pretend that I'm alright like I've got over everything. but I can't do it anymore. I can't go fake the truth like I did before. I have to stop pretending.

Life is unfair. never will. stop dreaming. like in hell it will. I've always reminded myself that I've got my friends to stand by me and help me go through this shits. but what if, hmm I lose them. I'm scared. I would do anything just to get me wonderful life back.

Friends,
please dont leave me like he did.

He, who makes me smile.

Ended up with, leaving me all confused.

I do love him very much.

never expected this to happen,

never thought those days would come to an end.

This and that.

2008-11-09T10:28:00.000-08:00

I'm like so so emo these past few days. hahaha. tengok saja lah, amboi amboi semua emotional punya kan kan. pedulik aku. teheee x)

I feel leftout sangat oh, hmmm, ye lah kan ish aku dekat kelantan kan. :( I have no one. seriously, i'm all alone. cibaibabibai. so yeah I called kakak. gossip itu dan ini, hooyeah, she puts a smile on my face, smile je keeeee? padahal gelak guling dah aku, tak tahan do sumpah. haha. BETUL LAH. she heals my pain, oh as easy as an abc.
tengah seronok-seronok gelak ni, tuptup ter-nangis. haha cane tu? blame kakak for this. boooo! haha. anyways, i love her so much more than anything. she owns my heart. ceewah. :):):) tak puas bercakap, kitorang texting pulak. haha mcm berpacaran do.

kata-kata kakak yang mengusik hati dan jiwa ini. caya beb. ni haa:
"There's nothing wrong with defending your boundaries when you feel the need. Specifically, you don't have to be nice if someone isn't respecting you by acting overly pushy or domineering toward you."

Kakak, please come back fast!

In need of you and your superb advices.

No longer.

2008-11-09T09:57:00.000-08:00

I sadly realized that imma part of your game. whatthafuck.
(eh no, *punch self* don't ever use that kind of words. ececeh haha)

Hmmmmmmmm,
sakitnya hati ini. saaaakiitt sangat weh. adoidoidoi. you won't understand sweetie, how much it hurts. seriously you won't, cause you yourself never bother to care about it. it's hard to forget about all this shits. as hard as a rock. haha lol. and yes, now that i'm telling you, i regret. ohhh yes! but heh, it's getting late now. too late to regret. pftt. i don't know why you treat me so bad. apa salah aku? haih. would you ever think about what you're about to do to me? would you, now that i'm asking you. (i ain't got no clue)

what was I just about to discover is...
Well this song: Lie About Us by Avant and Nicole, says it all.
The lyric, oh wow, it's all true. :)

My soulmate.

2008-11-09T09:27:00.001-08:00

Virginie Laurency

The one who thinks i'm just the same without makeup. She tell me that i'm always right. She's there to listen and calm me down whenever i'm down. She puts away everything just to comfort and console me. We quarrel a lot, that was then. I'm so happy now that we're back on track. I love this girl.

My babygurlzz.

2008-11-08T12:34:00.000-08:00

Atikah Aliah

The one who is constantly reminding me of how much she cares about me. And yes, she always tell me that everything's gonna be okay. We spend our whole night, gossiping by the help of supersavers. Hehe. It never bores me, I swear.

if you were a poker cards,

you'll definitely be the queen.

My twinnie.

2008-11-08T12:19:00.000-08:00

Nurul Ain Syafiqah

The one who stick with me through my good and bad. She shows me love in every way. I hurt her way too much, no really. But still, she stays. We've been through together, through thick and thin. There is no friendship without a silly fuss and fights. I love her.

My sunshine.

2008-11-08T12:03:00.000-08:00

Siti Nur Asilah

The one I can't live without. She's wonderful and my other half. We enjoy hanging out together, just the two of us, in the morning. Cam-whoring is what we do best. The very 1st person i turn to whenever i'm upset.

akan ku cinta padamu,

wahai raja hatiku<3

New start.

2008-11-08T11:44:00.000-08:00

I'm done with wishing and hoping. yes. i'm done with tears, being in all blue. i'm sick and tired of everything. i just can't help it. i've issues with changes and i can't cope with it. so what? i've had enough, well more than enough. haih. mhmm, i'm in need of my own space and time. new start, i must say.

Shela says:
i dah baca dah
Shela says:
dah lah bie
Shela says:
tanak lah sdh sdh ouh
Shela says:
ishhh tak suka i tgk u sdh je pasal lelaki

hehehe comel je kan kan? :) so hjyeahh, i won't go all blue, doing stupid things, crying over a guy. it's a waste of time.

I'm lost for words.

2008-11-08T10:35:00.000-08:00

This is goodbye. Your sweetest goodbye. :')

"I know its hard for you to let me go. N its hard for me too to let u go either . Ok,i tried to not calling or texting u . But i cant . Its hard for me to let u go. Evnthough ive got got mygirl but without u mylife wasnt complete. Am such a selfish pathetic guy. Sorry atilia. Am giving up. Its hurt to know that ure hurting while am happt with mylife. Isnt fair for u.ok ive made my decision, i wont call or msg u anymore evnthough its hard. Nt ths is for our own good rite? To let u moveon with ur life. i think ths is the best way . Takecare . I sayang u . Byebye ."

Go your way, I'll go mine.

Live your life, I'll live mine.

You'll be good, I'll be fine.

Bloody SPM yo.

2008-11-03T12:58:00.000-08:00

Mhmm imma gonna be away to Kelantan from Tuesday until Saturday. And yeah after that, I'll be away for quite sometime due to SPM. From now onwards, Ashela owns my account :) Ohyeah, I don't myspace as often anymore, well if you wanna find me, come and text me. Take care Loved Ones. :)

Much love Xx,
Frezailah Atilia.

Birthday girl.

2008-11-03T07:35:00.000-08:00

Happy 14th Birthday, Anith<3 babyyyyy!

Sweet fourteen lilo, enjoy your day. Have a blast one okay. And do have fun. May God bless you always, and hooyeah with Mukhlis aswell, tehee. :) You helped me alot sugar, lottttssss, and i owe you. Thanks for everything love. I'm glad that you always there when i'm in need of someone to talk to, hehe weee, thanks again tau tau.

Take a good care of yourself alright sayang. Much love, Atilia. Xoxo.

Thank god I found you.

2008-11-02T22:16:00.000-08:00

I cried so hard, i couldn't even sleep myself. i tried. i keep reminisce the past, i know i should've just move on. but heh, i can't. *punch self* i cry, i cry and again i cry. i tried to close my eyes and sleep. all of sudden, hok aloh phone bergegar. hehe kacauuu betul :p

OHMYGODDDDDD! SAY WHAAAAATTTTT?! O.O

i wipe my tears and started to read. mak aihh karangan do. haha. guess what, he texted me :) hehe i'm soooo happy and touched. fuck, i miss him!

here's the text:
I'm lying alone with my head on the phone , waiting for u to call or text me and thinking of u till it hurts . I know u hurt too but what can i do ? I wish i could take u with me . I wish i could give u the world . I wish i could make u smile n take u together with myheart . Fewdays without u like its the end of the world . My day wasnt complete without u in mylife . Something is missing from the day u says goodbye . No more lights in myheart . No more joy . I wish that i could stop the time or turn back time when we are together . The day that u n me were happy . Heres the truth . Ure the best thing that happen to me . Ure nice n sweet . If we meet , lets say that i would stop the time n say that ure beautiful n i would stare at u until the sun goes up . Because ure so beautiful . Hey im sorry if i msg u nw . Jst that i didnt say goodbye to u . Ths is my last msg to u . I hope that u will find nice guy .

few minutes after he sent that text, he sent another text. hehehe. :)))

here it goes...
Sweet memories with u . The greatest love with u . But nw its jst a dream . i hope that u will come back to me but its jst a dream wont come true . Hear me baby , "i miss u" . Still for u . Ill keep ur love with me . Eventhough we're not together . No one can replace u . Urmph . I miss u and please dont msg me . Please dont . I dnt want u to get hurt . I rindu u n im happy that i kenal u . Take care ok atilia ? Enjoy ur life . Take care n miss u :-)

I miss you more, oh boy! xoxo. :)

Be strong.

2008-11-02T21:54:00.000-08:00

Yesterday was a terrible day, full of tears. i just can't control my feelings. i'm breaking down, i fell, and i stumbled. i can't face it alone. i can't pretend that i'm doing good. i just can't -.- pftt. i'm not that strong okay, i'm weak. so yeah, i did express my feelings to certain people, trusted ones. i'm so touched, no really :) they stand by me through my darkest hour. hehe thank you korang.

Elly:
Nov 3, 2008 1:36 AM
OMGG ;(((((((((((((((((((((((
Nov 3, 2008 1:47 AM
tili sayang . i sedih baca sumpah ;( i knw how you're feeling right now . stay strong pls my dear .
Nov 3, 2008 1:57 AM
hmm . i dnt knw what exactly happened between you guys . look syg , i knw it will all be alright soon okay . talk to me la alright if you ada probs . i knw you're strong you can deal wth any problems like before ;)

Icky:
Nov 3, 2008 12:13 AM
i love you baby boo , remember that .

Lilot:
Nov 3, 2008 1:27 AM
yeah :) allright , tabahkan hati XD he he

Tasnim's Courtesy.

2008-11-02T00:08:00.000-07:00

What's the first thing you'll do when you turn 18?:
drive a car.
Wheres the last place you went?:
usj 4, subang.
When will you kiss the last person you kissed?:
it's dylla, my cousin. i have no idea. it's really hard to hang around with her lah nowdays, pftt, how sad. i miss her.
Do you find piercings attractive?:
it depends, but yes.
When was the last time you saw snow?:
masa kecil.
Who was the last person you sat next to?:
hafiz.
When was the last time you cried?:
i can't recall.
What are your plans for tomorrow?:
mhmm skip school. not in an illegal way.
How long is your hair?:
medium and messy.
What color are your eyes?:
dark brown.
Who do you dislike currently?:
no one.
If you could have something right now, what would it be?:
suzuki swift.
Do you miss anything/anyone?:
i do. so much.
What song are you currently listening to?:
fall for you by secondhand serenade.
If you caught a significant other cheating on you what would you do?:
walk away from his life.
What time did you wake up this morning?:
1++.
Who was the last person you talked to?:
kakak.
Ever liked someone that you didn't think you stood a chance with?:
mhmm yeah.
Is someone on your mind right now?:
YES!
Have you seen anyone lately that you don't get along with but you said hi anyways?:
mhmm yeah. terpaksa pulak.
Who has your heart at the moment?:
no one else can ever take the place where asraff stands in my heart now.
Have you ever changed your clothes while in a vehicle?:
haha yeah semalam.
Do you like hugs?:
i enjoy. but with certain people, yes.
Are you a loud person?:
i can be.

Brand new day.

2008-11-01T23:48:00.000-07:00

Totally moved on from the last fucked up relationship. :)
mhmm yeah, that fucked up 1 year relationship. it's all load of bullshits *no offence. but hey, what's done is done. i'm alright now and beginning new chapters in my life. i don't give two fucks well if you people, talk shits about me cause i have a life to worry about mhmm rather than crying or fighting over a shit you came up with. i have better things to do rather than thinking about your problems.

Much Love,
Xx.

Wipe your tears, girl.

2008-11-01T23:37:00.000-07:00

Oh cibaibibabibabibai. nangis do tengok bawah ni. betuuuuuuuuuullll. sumpah, tak tipu! =(

You always thought that i was stronger. (i'm not!)
You think that i dumped you. (i'm not!)
You think that i never ever loved you before. (i'm not!)
You think that i can move on just like that. (i can't!)

:(

sedih bodo. sumpah. nangis tengok gambar bawah ni semua. gahhh. hok aloh sukahati lah nak emo. PFTTTTT. screw you byotch!

It will always be you.

2008-11-01T23:34:00.000-07:00

Asraff made this for me.

Isn't that so sweet of him? :')

Get it right.

2008-11-01T23:32:00.000-07:00

I dont want a fling,

I want the real deal.

( If only it is that easy kan. )

Heleeza je.

2008-11-01T23:22:00.000-07:00

oh my god, i'm really really really sorry for what happened that night. i just got off the messenger without even telling you. i away masatu, pergi minum kejap, then when i balik, perghh dah offline dah -.- i can't even read apa you nak cakap and explain. adoidoi. sorrrrryyyy babe. :) sorry sangat-sangat. i didn't mean it.

and yeah, mhmm. be strong and be tough okay. i know it's really hard for you to do so, but you gotta try though. who knows it works? think positive okay. lemme know if you need someone to talk to or to lean on, i'll be there for sho. you know i will. don't be sad okay babe. now, smile. =)

it's not wrong to really love someone. go on! you go girl! i'm here to support you. hehe. kadang-kadang kena fikir diri sendiri jugak, it's not that wrong to be a little bit selfish sometimes. kan? betul tak? so yeah, think about yourself and your happiness too. forget about his memories, past is past. i'm a part of his memories, forget about that babe! you're just being paranoid if you still reminisce about it and sedih merana semua. adohai, cerita lama sudah. tahun 2008 pun nak tutup buku dah yang, hihi. sooooooo move on. lupakan kisah lama itu jantan!

you gotta start a new life, YES, a brand new day baby. that's what i'm talking about now. okay now, GO AND GET HIM BABY WHILE STOCK LAST hooyeahh.

Reminisce.

2008-11-01T23:21:00.001-07:00

I'm sorry for everything. i think this is goodbye. just take a good care of yourself. just know that, i'll be here for you, always. i'm sorry for everything, mhmm i never meant to hurt you. i lied if i said i never cried for you. (pftt)

I miss you every single day that you went away. i cried almost everyday. i gave you everything. i know you saw everything that i've done, but you acted like you didn't. because deep down inside, i know you still love her. you never saw me who was infront of you. and it's okay, you know. i still loved you.

well yeah, i really wish it didn't have to end like this. it breaks my heart to let you go. but mhmm this is what you want. i tried. she's so lucky to have someone like you. :')

I miss this girl.

2008-11-01T23:06:00.000-07:00

Izyan Azrin. :)

I miss you sayang. i really do. rindu sangat-sangat. i miss those days, please come back! :( i'm like so weak now, i can't do this alone yang, i need your support. i'm just worry that you'll forget about me and stop loving me cause you're oh so far away. you are the one i can't live without. i love you in all our moments of insanity, sadness and glory more than any words could ever say.

i love u i love u i love u i lovee u i loveee u i loooveee u

Day by day.

2008-11-01T22:23:00.000-07:00

Monday reminds me of your mesmerizing eyes.
Tuesday reminds me of your charming smile.
Wednesday, Thursday, Friday and the rest of the week,
reminds me of you leaving me without knowing that,
you are my life.

He, who makes me smile.

2008-11-01T22:08:00.000-07:00

I less than three you, babycake. :)

Sweet turns to bitter.

2008-11-01T13:44:00.000-07:00

Lemme get it straight to the point. honestly speaking, i am so not jealous of your new life. why should I? gimme five good reasons, boleh? haha you're so funny. no, really. i can tell you're enjoying your life so far now. i'm glad too. this is what you want, congratulations. :)

I miss us, fullstop. a year is not that easy to pursue. but hey, *knock knock*, it's a brand new day man. :) past is past. i agreed with your statement. very. hehe. all this time we've been living in a lie. don't you think so, babe?

Lemme tell you something,
the great love that I have for you is gone. and I find my dislike for you grows everyday. you think only of yourself. you're different now. well if we were married, haha as you planned, I know that I would find life very difficult, and I would have no pleasure in living with you. I have a heart to give but it is not something that I want to give to you. no one is more foolish and selfish than you. I can't continue taking this from you okay. don't take me for a fool. *sighs

I sincerely want you to understand that I speak the truth.

Easier said than done.

2008-11-01T13:40:00.000-07:00

You were always my strength, the shoulder for me to cry on, the place for me to feel comfort. and only god knows how much you mean to me, and how much i miss you. you're one of a kind, it's really hard to find a guy like you. i met him but i lost him. mhmm, i still hope for the day where we would have just one more night together, again, just the two of us. I miss you so much, when we have to be apart. i just can't stand the fact that we have to be separated this far boy.

:'((((

I'm weaaaakkkkkk! i can't do this. do this alone. alone by myself. :(

Crack me up.

2008-11-01T13:38:00.000-07:00

I love everything about you. no, really. mhmm. your hair, your plumpy cheeks, your lame jokes, hehe you know teka-teki you tu ha :P your smile, your way of showing that you don't have to try so hard to make me fall for you, the way you never fail to make me smile when i'm all messed up and upset and down, the way you express your feelings, the way you mad at me when i failed to go persuade you, the way you slowly whisper "i love you". i miss you boy, i really do. i miss us. :(

You're worth every second,
You complete me.

Erinna's Courtesy.

2008-11-01T13:31:00.000-07:00

Would you hug your ex again?
not anymore.
Why did you and your last ex break up?
it's a long story and i think that you don't have to know well cause i'm not telling.
How many girlfriends or boyfriends did you actually love?
only some.
Have you ever loved someone so much that it hurt?
mhmm yeah. well there is no love without pain okay, agree?
Have you ever made a boyfriend or girlfriend cry?
i think so, yeah.
Are you happier single or in a relationship?
it depends. sometimes i felt lonely -.-
Would you ever lie to get an ex back?
i'm not that low.
Have you ever been cheated on?
yeah.
Have you ever told someone you loved them and didn't mean it?
yes.
Have you ever had your heart broken?
yes.
If you could go back in time and change things, would you?
past is past.
Do you still love your ex?
not anymore.
Do you believe that you are a good girlfriend or boyfriend?
i can be.
Have you ever dated some one who was not good to you?
yeah.
Have you dated someone older than you?
yeah.
Do you believe everyone deserves a second chance?
well, it depends.
Do you believe in love at first sight?
sometimes.
Ever want to get married?
someday.
Ever kissed your friend's boyfriend or girlfriend?
eeee i'm not that low man.
If given a chance, would you like to have your ex back?
not anymore.
Still Friends with your exs?
some of them.
Do You Like Anyone now?
i think so, yeah.

Ssa's Courtesy.

2008-11-01T13:23:00.000-07:00

Think back to the last person you held hands with, would you kiss them?
well, mhmm sure.
Is there anyone you really want to see right now?
TOTALLY!
When did you first get Myspace?
since i was in form one.
What are you listening to?
it's not over by secondhand serenade.
Do you miss anyone?
i do.
Do you like someone whose name starts with a B, D, M, C, A or J?
i'm not telling.
Does the last person who put their arms around you mean anything to you?
acu jie? haha yes, he's my brother.
Would you consider yourself to be spoiled?
sometimes.
Do you think you will be in a relationship three months from now?
let's just wait and see.
Did you go to sleep last night smiling?
mhmm nope.
What does the 4th text message in your inbox say?
"atilia d hun..u kt mane? dah jmpe umah ur fren nye bf?" -danny
What was the last thing you bought something?
marlboro light 14.
Have you ever kissed anyone whose name started with a L?
latif.
Do you believe in true love?
for now, it's crap.
Is there a person of the opposite sex who means a lot to you?
sangat-sangat.

Let it out.

2008-11-01T13:18:00.000-07:00

hello journal. :)

well yeah, here's the story. sit back, woo be calm, grab some pop corns ke eh eh snickers or yeah kit kat would be definitely great. yuumyyyy! hihi. *sshh* the story goes...

we were both fourteen years old tau that time, and we became friends after getting to know each other. it was like sort of le, one of those, "love at first sight" *ececeh. kind of things for both of us, and we soon began hanging out a lot lah together, studying for mid year and tests semua lah kan. then, grabbing a bite to eat, catching a movie with friends, i mean other friends pun ikut, hihi.

we discovered we had so much in common, itu ini semua agak a lebih kurang sama je semua tau -.-, and i was convinced this guy was "the guy". he was everything, yes EVERYTHING, i wanted in a boyfriend. hah! can you guys, like woohoo, imagine lah? hehehehe. he was cute, nice, veryvery sensitive, funny. its just that err dia putih sangat sial, gila not my type :s bila jalan bersama macam errr then grhh ouchh gila tahu takk. haha tapaham tapa lah en, teehee ;)

things felt so riigghhtt. that i thought my feelings were mutual. while nothing had happened to indicate we were more than friends. what a pity :/ cheii. i felt very clearly that's where we were going, so when i confessed to him how i felt one rainy day. cam after school, jumpa semua kejap. so i did confessed :s (eyy bukan terus ckp, i suka you, be mine? eeee. no no!) it was rainy day tau that evening, he didnt even respond (babi lebih kau ni HAHAHAHA) the way i'd hoped, and there, hmm i was really really crushed.

i was really dissapointed, and i felt hopeless, so cam pergi habis credit call my bestfriend ni tau. then then, my bestfriend explained that he did like me, its just that, he had just gotten out of a relationship and he didnt want to go there again. well in the same time, he told me that he still liked me a lot and wanted to continue spending time together. well hmm, i couldnt do it. i knew i'd never be able to just, "hang out" as friends, oh just friends, knowing that i felt something more yeah more than he did for me. (can you guys imagine it?)the end, thank you.well koraaaannggg, its normal thing kan? mcm, its a common dilemma when friends crush on other friends. kan kan? LOL.

I still remember a crush of mine who broke my heart.

Description.

2008-11-01T13:08:00.000-07:00

Faiznur Atiqah, she knows me better :
Frezailah Atilia bt Mohd Zaini ,the youngest . my only baby sister . i'm close to her then to my brother . we share everythings together . our problems sometimes our things . yes, i can't deny . we do fight ,but we unite easily kan ? So , she's hyper n loud . cool n care about her sista so much , which was me x). always lend her money to me n always pinjam mine also . smart ,yes she is . sensitive n humble . get cry easily . flirt flirt je kerja kau ni, hish tak suka ;P. so ,to me she's the greatest sister . my both siblings , equally good la actually . olwite darling ? kakak always support you in everything ,no matter what . we're forever sisters . there's nothing can tear us apart ,no one dares . take care ,baby. i love you to bits ,forever and always . and i really care about you.hugs n kisses, kakak. x)

What's on my mind.

2008-11-01T13:04:00.000-07:00

I used to think that finding someone you can click with, someone who made your stomach feel sick, your hands starting to shake and your whole body feel off balance, was always going to mean something special. but these are things that just happen, they're not a result of something he's doing for you. he isn't making these things happen, they just happen. what i've come to realize is, what matters is how he makes you feel on purpose. the feelings he can cause in you that are every bit of his control. he is calling just to say he misses you, lying in bed next to you while you're reading your favourite 'romance fiction', turning off his favourite hardcore music when you're in the car with him just because you get a headache by listening to them, trying to crack a stupid joke to make you laugh or learning to accept that you like the one team in football he couldn't stand. these are the feelings that do not just fade away in time, because he won't let them. if it's really something, he'll be able to make you feel those things no matter the circumstance. agree much? better admit now! ;p hihi.

Till then, Xx.

Refreshed.

2008-11-01T13:02:00.000-07:00

Hooyeahhh people! I'm back on track. :)

Pftt. lupa password la, hehe, so yeah.

I'm off to bed. Good night, bitches and bastards.

Xx.